Wednesday

It's Wednesday and I'm determined to get something done. So far I've gone along my usual internet road. So far "checking my email" meant visiting seven websites. I'm feeling anxiety, fear that I'll miss something fun or cool and the desire to belong. I'm also having internet identity issues. You know where you go online and you're projecting a persona or trying to be something more than you're just being yourself. I have to remind myself that that's a trap that's easy to fall into when no one can see or hear you. You want to put the "best" face on yourself. Be careful how you define that. It's ok for that to ebb and flow, for me to start doing it then straighten myself out. Those who love me will love me no matter what. That's like 3 people. And that's fine!

I don't have much on my plate today. It's about to be 2:00pm and I am not yet dressed. I got up at NOON. But if I get dressed in the next 30 minutes I'll still be making progress. Dress, mop and bank. If I accomplish those three things the rest is just the cherry on top. I don't really like candied cherries. The whipped cream.

I spend a lot of time last night trying to organize my television viewing.

My ipod works! that's exciting. I'm updating the songs. I have so much to do seriously and frivolously. I guess I should make a big huge list and then divide it up... or make two lists... important to do and unimportant to do. I need to eat better. I need to exercise. I need to put more energy into my relationship with God. *sigh*

I'm overwhelming myself while sitting still. I need to take action. JR & co are traveling up the east coast... well they will be. Right now they are in New Orleans helping people build houses & other stuff. Wow. Ah well...

I'm optimistic. Uh.... yeah.